The 10 Best Quotes Ever said on Love, Marriage, Men and Woman.

As recommended by:

Love

• "Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties." - Jules Renard.
• "If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?" - Lily Tomlin.
• "Is sex dirty? Only when it's being done right." - Woody Allen, Everything you Always Wanted to Know about Sex, but were Afraid to Ask, 1972.
• "Continental people have sex-lives; the English have hot-water bottles." - George Mikes, How to be an Alien, 1946.
• "Sex appeal is 50 per cent what you've got, and 50 per cent what people think you've got." - Sophia Loren.
• "Sex between a man and a woman can be wonderful, provided you can get between the right man and the right woman." - Woody Allen.
• "When you're away, I'm restless, lonely, Wretched, bored, dejected; only here's the rub, my darling dear, I feel the same when you're near." - Samuel Hoffenstein.

Marriage

• "Bigamy is having one spouse two many. Monogamy is just the same." -Anonymous.
• "When two divorced people marry, four people get into bed." - Jewish proverb.
• "Mummy, mummy, what's an orgasm? I dunno. Ask your father." -Anonymous.
• Barbara Walters: "You've been married 42 years. What makes your marriage work?" Robert Mitchum: "Lack of imagination, I suppose."
• "Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets." - Ogden Nash.

Men

• "Men are creatures with two legs and eight hands." - Jayne Mansfield.
• "Bachelors have consciences, married men have wives." - H. L. Mencken.
• "Male sexual response is far brisker and more automatic: it is triggered easily by thing, like putting a quarter in a vending machine." - Alex Comfort.
• "When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her." - Sacha Guitry.
• "Bachelors know more about women than married men do. If they didn't, they'd be married too." - H. L. Mencken.
• "God made man, and then said "I can do better than that" and made woman." - Adela Rogers St. John.

Women

• "It's the good girls who keep the diaries; the bad girls never have the time." - Tallulah Bankhead.
• "When a woman behaves like a man, why can't she behave like a nice man?" - Dame Edith Evans.
• "There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible." - P. J. O'Rouke.

Misc

• "If you are ever in doubt as to whether to kiss a pretty girl, always give her the benefit of the doubt." - Thomas Carlyle.
• "I'll come up and make love to you at five o'clock. If I'm late, start without me." - Tallulah Bankhead.
• "I'm always looking for meaningful one-night stands." - Dudley Moore.

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Drawing by Gail Gourley of USA, an entry from CorelDraw's $1,000,000 World Design Contest 1992.